Monday, September 29, 2008

Planning to 'Wing it'

I didnt sleep well last night, and the lingering effects are that of a hangover. I look like crap, I feel like crap, I really want to curl up and go to sleep, and I have heartburn that I think was spawned from the delecious black forest mocha I wasnt going to indulge in this morning... I hate heartburn. It reminds me of being pregnant, when I ate berry flavored tums like they were candy. I'm cranky and I dont want to work, which is another unfortunate part of it being Monday because of course there is alot of stuff for me to procrastinate on. And for some reason the more I try to procrastinate the more my office becomes a central meeting point for everyone else who wants to procrastinate but make it look like they're really working, which makes it really hard to fake working. I mean, it sounds like I'm working so all should be good... maybe.

So over the weekend I was thinking about this blog. I really just need a sounding board, a place to write. Some place where others may eventually read what I put into words, and even comment some time. I really enjoy reading other people's blogs, I'm possibly even a little envoius of all the people who discovered this excellent time killer long before I. This is not MySpace, WOO HOO! or Facebook. This isnt a popularity contest, at least not in the same sense as other "social networking" sites. It's refreshing to me, at least at this point... I'm babbling arent I? ok... rewind...

Thinking about this blog over the weekend, and all of the things I could write about and it struck me that I could easily write a biography of the past ten years in one blog just to get all of the background to where I am now... but rest assured, I wont. I'm sure some things will come to surface in my entries because every event in the past 8 years or so has lead up to exactly where I am in my life right now. People talk about regrets and if only's, but I can honeslty say that while I have made some really selfish and just plain BAD choices, I do not regret a single one. I know, in my soul, that if I changed even one key event of the past 8 years, I wouldnt be in the relationship I'm in, I wouldn't be living the life I am living, and I wouldn't be happier (in the big scheme of things) than I ever could have imagined. I have an amazing daughter, a decent paying job, a mostly loyal puppy, a work in progress 4 year old buckskin quarterhorse, and plans to marry the man of my dreams once we work out some details. Who could ask for more than that?

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