My Love's children are some of the best behaved kids I've ever met. (truly.) You can take them anywhere and they are age appropriately mature and respectful towards people whom they are not related to. Having said that...
So seriously, my going to be step-son is 13 years younger than I am.
He thinks he knows everything, and what he doesn't know he thinks he doesn't need to know. The other day we were all watching TV and something was mentioned about a prosthetic hand and my love asked him if he knew what a prosthetic was and he said, "Don't need to."
Most days I simultaneously heart him, and want to beat him in the head with the muck shovel.
The little turd memorised the combo to the gun safe. The gun safe that we bought specifically to keep his grubby little hands off the guns. (I keep typing fun instead of gun... hehehe) See, he gets bored like most ADOS people and starts to snoop around and getting into stuff. The kid is always in trouble, mostly because he has ZERO respect for other people's things and he has a really crappy-I'm too cool for this-what are you gonna do about it-attitude.
(again with the shovel beating)
He thinks school is pointless, because he doesn't get it so he spends his days being "popular" and watching flies rather than asking for help and doing his school work. He is living with this illusion that life is grand and he can skate through it and will still make enough money to shop at Hollister, live in a huge house, drive a brand new car..... you know, all those illusions that 14 year olds have.
I'm sad to say, his dad rides him about the most menial things. So it really does seem like he cant do anything right. So when he does something really stupid, like getting into the gun (I did it again!) safe, or failing all of his classes, or making a bow and shooting a plastic arrow into the sheet rock in the garage or going through the DVDs in my room as though they were his own... the list of stupid things goes on and on and on... there is no differentiating between big things and him forgetting to take out the trash.
Since we are planning to get a house in June anyway, we have decided to move him in with us for the rest of the school year, starting after Christmas break. The school he goes to now is a pretty typical, over populated, suburban middle school. The new school is K-8 and has one classroom of 8th graders... tee hee... mwahahaha... and I'm not nearly as lax as he thinks I am on the weekends. Yes, this plan is sneaky and probably evil, but it's also for his own good!
It kinda sucks...I really want to have his back and make my love stop riding him so hard, but inevitably every single time I try to back him up he's lied or manipulated or just plain effed up and I look the fool. Fortunately my love knows all his tricks... I'm just discovering that I truly can not trust him and I don't like learning that about people. Especially people (kids or adults) that I have defended and tried to put my faith in.
Friday, December 12, 2008
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3 comments:
Bless you for what you do! I have a niece that is 15 years younger than me and I have spent most of those 15 years helping to raise her. I had the benefit of doing it from the time she was born, I get the impression that you have not. Hang in there. He's a kid and will grow out of this phase... evenually and if you let him live. haha. My strongest card to play with her has always been our close proximity in age. She is 13 now and living in NY with her mom again. She still calls for advice and just to talk. There was quite some time where it was lies and manipulation. Nothing is more rewarding than that trust she has in me now. You will get that, too. So, in the mean time keep the muck shovel handy, he'll catch on soon enough.
Man, there seems so many possible conversation angles this post could take, I just don't know what to say.
It sounds like you have your hands full (how do you like that cliche to describe such an overwhelmingly complicated situation? Man it's easy being on the outside).
I have no advice. Well, maybe one thing: Dairy Queen has an amazing strawberry cheesecake blizzard. Maybe you should consider having one of those in case the thoughts of a shovel start coming up again?
That's all I got ...
Kaydee ~ Thank you! I keep calling my mother and apologising and thanking her for not giving up on me. I think that's what he's expecting, that we'll just give up! I can't wait til he's grown and looks back in the same way that I am.
Josh ~ mmmmm... Dairy Queen! There is one right by my gym. Eat a blizzard then run for an hour. Either way I'll feel better, or be too exhausted to pick up the shovel. :o)
Thanks for the comments guys!
~cheers
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