Pirate Princess Monkey

My Daughter is the light of my world
She is my reason for breathing, for growing up, for going to work everyday, for not settling.

My Daughter once broke my nose with her forehead
I tried to pick her up while she was protesting

My Daughter is a princess
and acts accordingly, on all levels

My Daughter's life saved my life
Plain and simple

My Daughter was born with huge feet
I had to buy her 3 month socks as a newborn

My Daughter is misunderstood
Frequently

My Daughter is difficult
Just like her mother

My Daughter used to throw these intense fits
I was afraid to take her anywhere for an entire year

My Daughter is strong willed
May that never be broken

My Daughter is beautiful
And she's missing 4 teeth

My Daughter loves all things girly
I dont know where this came from

My Daughter gives the worlds best hugs
And kisses

My Daughter loves Green Eggs and Ham
Thank you, Thank you, Sam-I-Am

My Daughter is afraid of large groups of people
and the hair dryer, vaccume, bathroom fan, and coffee grinder

My Daughter can speak!
Even when she's not makign sense... they are words... and you can understand them

My Daughter has the heart of an angel
She's hurt easily, but forgives quickly

My Daughter cries if I cry
Because it makes her sad
Then she wraps her arms around me, pats my back and says "Dont be sad mommy, it's ok."

My Daughter is not violent, "spoiled", vindictive, or a brat
She is not retarded. She is not misdiagnosed.

My Daughter is Autistic.

~~~~~

I did not make Monkey autistic. I could not prevent it. Vaccines may not have caused it. No one knows what did. I dont blame anyone. I'm not angry. I dont want "justice" at the price of however millions of dollars some attorney seeks for other parents of autistic kids.

I love my daughter... with all that I am. She is healthy. She is active. She loves school and her friends. She needs patience and love, just like every single other child on this planet.

Last weekend I was out shopping with my best friend. We walked past a young mom struggling with a little girl, about 3 or 4 years old. The girl was tired, didnt want to hold her mom's hand to cross the parking lot, and eventually parked her rear on the sidewalk. The mom was trying the "good mom" things to get the child to get up and come with her, in her calm voice holding on to the girls hand... wanting to drag her along side but not willing to go to such extremes in public. The child was screaming and making a scene. The mom maintained composure. I smiled at the mom... I wanted to go over and hug her. I wanted to tell her it was going ok, that I could relate to what she was experiencing. I wanted to tell her not be embarassed, and just keep breathing, that she was doing a great job!

I love Monkey! I love her more than anything.

A Breath of Fresh Air

Happy Monday!

I'm in good spirits today.

I'm sure you all know that the Steelers won the Superbowl... I'm not a huge football fan. I "watch" when I must. But when James Harris ran 100 for a touchdown in the 2nd Qtr, I was hooked. It was probably the best game I've seen in a LONG time!



I actually had a great time at the Superbowl shindig yesterday. I really need to learn not to let my own insecurities get the best of me. (that was hard to type) I got to talk to my love on our way home about how I was feeling about going, and he basically came to the same conclusion. I came from a group of friends who got together all the time (seriously... every weekend) and when I met my love we hung out with his friends pretty regularly. But families happen and life happens, and unlike my old friends who still party like their 22, we're all settling down and growing up (in that sense) so just because we don't hang out with them all the time doesn't mean they aren't our friends.



I'm But also because we picked a place and set the date for the wedding!
YES!!! So now I can leave my love alone about it and start the fun stuff. Like colors and flowers and bridesmaids dresses and decorations and stuff... yep yep I'm gettin' 'xcited!

I also got to talk to the former other office goddess this morning. Once again, I took her actions personally when in fact they were not directed toward me at all. Someday I will stop doing that... maybe... I hope

Monkey is getting one of those coughs that makes me sad for her. Her lungs sound awful, and the roommates are due home this week. I'm praying praying praying for her sake that they catch another load or two and can stay on the road for at least another week.



I'm reading this book called "The Shack" by Wm. Paul Young. The other office goddess recommended it about a month ago when I was talking to her about my inherit struggle with church, keeping a faithful heart, and reflecting a "Christian" attitude in a world full of hypocrites and negativity. In the incredible way that God works, I happened upon it at Costco for $9.88 (I LOVE COSTCO BOOKS!) so I picked it up. It's such an incredible testimony. I don't know if it's part because it's local or because I'm a mother, or just because the Lord puts things in our lives to talk to us and sometimes we don't always see them for what they are, but I want to drive out to Wildcat and see if I can find the author's house just so I can give him a hug and thank him for sharing his story. I highly recommend it! If like to read, and you have time for such things, you'll blast right through it.

~cheers!